Dear A

Dear Allen,

This is a letter to introduce myself to you, as one of the titled ‘Best Friends’ that your fiance has. Your future wife and I grew up together since we were 10 years old, along with our other best friends. We have always treated each other like family, and I look forward to welcoming you to our unit in the future. She chose you, after all the shitty boyfriends of the past, and I truly hope that you help encourage the best in one of the women who I love most. She has so much potential, and such a wonderful mind and kind soul; please don’t allow her to lose sight of that. She’s the type of person that needs a push to get her started, and I hope that you are a pusher who won’t take any of her bullshit excuses. She will want to fight you, and will be stubborn, but it is worth it in the end. She loves completely and wholly, and once you are in her family she would fight off any bear to keep you safe. Be cautious however, because as quickly as you are accepted into her family, you could just as quickly be out on the streets the next day because of a whim. I will admit for her that she is not the most rational individual at times, and will need a kind reality check quite often, however, she accepts these with grace and understanding. You are her world and her rock, and she would do nothing that would chisel away at that solid foundation she relies upon. Please be kind to her and understanding when she tries to pick a fight over nothing at all. She means well, she just has trouble finding the right words sometimes. She will be forever patient and accepting with you, and I ask that you do not take advantage of that, because if you do, I will hunt your ass down and teach you what true patience is by leaving you locked in a basement with no release in sight. Despite the pain and confusion that she has put me through over the years as her friend, if you do anything to harm her I am prepared to risk a felony charge, because I do truly love and care about her.

Perhaps one day I will have the pleasure of meeting you in person, and I hope that that day I can see the love in your eyes for my best friend. She does not love herself enough, and will need you to love her even more fully and unconditionally because of that. Please understand that this is not out of narcissism, it is from never being taught how to love not only your partner unconditionally but also yourself. I hope that you are the man who can teach her what pure, honest love and acceptance really is. I know she is self-conscious about the timeline of your dating and engagement, and I hope that it is what you two truly wish to have at this time in your life, and aren’t moving forward fast to compensate for other unsatisfying elements in your life. I just truly wish the best for the two of you, and hope that this union will be good for you both. I hope that neither of you are selling yourselves short and that this chance to officially commit to each other was too good to pass up versus too easy to not take advantage of. I know that marriage is not easy, but I hope that you both put in the work to make this work and never take the easy way at as a solution. I want you both to be happy, and I want to be a part of the future you two start together. Please remind her of that.



P.S. I want to get to know you and welcome you to the family of friends that your future wife was raised with. I want to give you a chance to succeed, and I don’t want you to be hesitant to reach out to me when you need advice about how to work better with her. I want her to be honest with you. And if I’m not meant to stay in her life, then I hope that you take care of the dear friend who I love and make her happy every day. I hope that she grows in the right directions and that you are there to help guide her. I love her deeply, and only wish the happiest of futures to her.


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