This is not my problem,
Yet I constantly give in to collateral guilt.
This was not my choice,
Yet I refrained from speaking up and adding a voice.
This one is out of my hands,
Yet it is something that I cannot seem to escape.
I know the choice I made,
But I did not consider the potential consequences,
And I never considered that this is how it would play out,
I never thought that I should have a shade of doubt,
That you might be the one that brings me down.
Since you were always there for me in times of need,
And I always considered you the friend who I could believe,
Has had these experiences and witnessed the struggle,
And could provide me with words for a rebuttal,
That proves that I was meant to survive this,
And I have the strength to do it with grace.
You were the person I always called when I hit bottom,
And you were the one who I respected blindly,
Because I could see there was so much you understood,
And so much more you could help me through.
But now that the roles are reversed,
And I am left to be the one who provides you with the strength,
And the guidance that helps you navigate,
I am left in a debate of if I should have ever trusted you in the first place.
I wonder if I should have ever believed you,
Or see value in the things you went through,
Because they have all been skewed by your point of view,
Which is inexperienced and shallow,
And based off of speculation versus knowledge,
Blurred together to present a mirage,
Of a life you think you have lived,
Versus the one that we were both given,
With the same opportunity and the same chance,
To make this something worthwhile that will last,
With the same parents and the same lack of prestige,
And yet all of the same basic needs.
But you will not admit that you messed this chance up,
And you will not see the evidence of your mistakes,
Instead denying that they ever even took place,
Because admitting defeat seems to come naturally to you,
And that is something I never taught you to do,
But is something I learned from you,
And something I wish we didn’t do,
Because defeat is not a true portrayal of what we have been through.
It may be what you focus on,
And it may be what blinds you from seeing,
That I am working on winning and I continue believing,
That that is within you as well,
And that we have the potential to grow with what we were originally dealt.
So at this point the choice is yours,
I have done all I can do and I have said all I needed to say,
And I can do nothing more to influence you to change,
This was never my problem,
But I know you needed someone to assist you,
In the same way you once assisted me,
But the difference was that I actually believed,
In the words that you spoke and the intentions you shared,
But now I feel that that isn’t there,
You don’t share the same respect,
And you don’t have the same resolve,
That I once had to change it all.
So this is no longer my issue,
I pass this back to you,
Since there is one thing I learned is true —
Only you can really save you from the things you do.